Blaming Saint Gregory

Satire is a tad late this week — or early as the case may be. But it is the feast of Saint Gregory the Great, the man it could be said is responsible for the Anglican Communion, due to his having sent Saint Augustine of Canterbury on his quest, after seeing the delightful English slaves in the Roman market, and being distressed that such nice people should be un-evangelized. So now you know who to blame. In any case, this little bit of doggerel is suitable for singing to any of the well known office tunes of the Gregorian tradition.

Apostle of the English blest,
what you once started, we have messed.
Begun by care for Anglo slaves,
look how Augustine’s church behaves!

You sent him overseas to Kent,
with no thought of Establishment;
his progeny have borne strange fruit,
about as peaceful as Beirut.

You were a monk before made pope,
a fact that often made you mope.
Perhaps if you had stayed in cloister
we’d not be in this present roister.

When you regard our state of things,
as one who now in glory sings,
do we deserve a passing glance?
“Just keep your church; I’ll take my chants.”

Tobias Stanislas Haller BSG
March 12, 2007

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