September 14, 2011

Word of the Circus

Word is circulating on the English semaphore and heliograph system that the Archbishop of Canterbury is thinking of taking an early retirement.

This has, quite naturally, brought about the commencement of the delicate ballet of succession, much of which happens offstage, of course. Offstage ballet is not nearly so interesting as offstage brass (á la Mahler or Wagner) — but come to think of it there has been a bit of onstage brass by a few of the bishops thought possible to succeed. There has been some furtive edging of mitres ever slightly so much closer to the invisible fairy ring which will ultimately appear, as if by magic, on the day of the announcement, to circle the Chosen One. Would it not come as a surprise to all if Harry Potter were, after all, to be the youngest Archbishop in recent history!

On a more balletic front, it is also rumored that in an effort to portray the drama of this offstage action, Cirque du Soleil is working up their next extravaganza, titled Cantuar. It will be their usual mix of humorous clowning, stellar acrobatics and above all contortionists in rochets. The show is to open with a spectacular example of dexterity called, "Qui? Moi? Mais non!" in which the bulk of the ensemble represent their eagerness to climb a slender rope while pretending they just happen to be hanging around in its vicinity. The buffo humorists will join in a chorus of "J'n'suis pas digne!" as a bevy of tightly clad androgynes (portraying the Crown Commissioners), huddle to one side in a tight-knit circle. Oh, what a show it will be!

With tongue in cheek,
Tobias Stanislas Haller BSG


Christopher Stephen Jenks said...

While reading your post, the following Beatle's classic came to mind:

"For the benefit of Mr. Kite
There will be a show tonight
on trampoline

"The Hendersons will all be there
Late of Pablo-Fanques is there, what a scene

"Over men and horses hoops and garters
Lastly through a hogshead of real fire!

"In this way Mr. K. will challenge the world!

"The celebrated Mr. K.
Performs his feat on Saturday at Bishopsgate

"The Hendersons will dance and sing
As Mr. Kite flies through the ring don't be late

"Mrs. K assures the public
Their production will be second to none

"And of course Henry The Horse dances the waltz-!

"The band begins at ten to six
When Mr. K. performs his tricks without a sound

"And Mr. H. will demonstrate
Ten somersets he'll undertake on solid ground

"Having been some days in preparation

"A splendid time is guaranteed for all
And tonight Mr. Kite is topping the bill-."

from St. Pepper

Leonard said...

Oh but what about the promised puppet show...looking forward to a little merry olde fashioned ¨Punch and Judy¨ (that is if female bishops are finally approved)?

June Butler said...

And in a side-show, AMiE declares its independence from the Church of England.

Tobias Stanislas Haller BSG said...

Thanks, Christopher Stephen. We are definitely in a mood for sparkly costumes and brass music!

Leonardo, the Poppets will no doubt be part of the fun.

And Mimi, of course there has to be a sideshow, and that group seems well suited to provide the proper carnival atmosphere.